DIY Does The Brits 2009: Live Updates
Every slip up, bad speech and costume disaster.
Here at DIY we know it's easy to poke fun at the Brit Awards. With its big name stars, predictable jokes and teary speeches (though even we admit that has died out of late) it's easy to forget about Britain's premiere awards and just turn on the Aston Villa game (don't you dare).
You see here we have a soft spot for the awards, and not just because it's a rare two hours on prime time television devoted to music. We love the high class performances, the collaborations and ultimately, the relatively unknown indie stars nominated for major awards. So we've decided to provide you with the ultimate breakdown of the Brits - a take by take commentary if you will - as the night's proceedings get underway. From Coldplay, The Last Shadow Puppets, Radiohead and Kings Of Leon we'll be here to give you every slip up, bad speech and costume disaster.
So if you're at work, watching the Villa game or reading this on Thursday morning, we present to you our alternative take on the 2009 Brits.
8.05pm U2 open the ceremony and manage a complete repetition of their Grammy Award performance a week ago. Bono has taken off his sunglasses- this is clearly a big moment.
8.10pm Duffy wins Best British Female, while James Corden and Matthew Horne join Kylie in a 'can't-get-you-out-of-my-head' dance. "I look like a trucker tranny"- James Corden
8.15pm Lionel Richie is on the stage! Katy Perry wins International Female Solo Artist and accepts her award dressed a little like a jewellery box.
8.20pm Girls Aloud appear with at least 50 white suited male dancers for 'The Promise' in very little costumes. As Fearne Cotton exclaims "Who needs a dress anyway?"
8.35pm Duffy wins her second award of the night (Best Breakthrough Act) presented by very cheeky chappy Alex James. Coldplay are decidedly average as they play 'Viva La Vida' covered in rose petals and it appears Fearne Cotton has been banished to a caravan for the night- the best place for her we reckon! Pointless celebrity appearance #1- Jamie Oliver. Though we do have to give him credit for refusing to comment on anything 'music related.'
8.47pm The first cliche speech of the night goes to Kings of Leon! "I'd like to thank God, my mum and to all you who voted because without you we'd be nothing." While Paul Weller did actually scoop the Best British Solo Male after betting had to stop two days ago due to the 'leaked results.'
9.04pm Pointless celebrity appearance #2- Joe Calzaghe. Looking a little out of place he just about manages to get his category right with Kings Of Leon this time thanking England "there would be no KOL without England!" Indeed. Take That also appear from the ceiling dressed as what we can only describe as posh geeks. If anyone has any idea what this theme was please let us know.
9.08pm Iron Maiden win Best Live Band. Provide pointless video clip.
9.10pm The Hoff is onstage!
9.15pm Elbow win Best British Group and again look genuinely happy. "You don't understand how long it's taken us to get this close to The Hoff." The first uncomfortable moment of the night finally happens as Guy Garvey asks The Hoff if he'd like a drink. We all know he's a recovering alcoholic!
9.20pm Kings Of Leon perform a rather understated 'Use Somebody' while pointless celebrity appearance #3 Gok Wan presents Best International Male Solo to an absent Kanye West. We were kinda hoping for a Beck win but whatever.
9.50pm Girls Aloud win their first Brit in seven years! And they're definitely happy about it, especially Sarah. Surprisingly enough Duffy also wins Best British Album while The Ting Tings give us a disastrous performance of 'That's Not My Name' with Estelle. Is it just us who is wondering why these two acts are big?
9.55pm Pet Shop Boys alert! We're currently watching Brandon Flowers duet with Neil Tennant and well, it's interesting- a sin indeed. 'You Were Always On My Mind' was number one when we were born- that's right fact fans, which if anything makes us think we're not quite qualified to cover this part of the awards. We can comment on the impressive dancers tonight though. The PSB crew is almost like a West End show. Lady GaGa is also dressed impressively American.
10pm So there we go. Duffy wins three awards and will no doubt be EVERYWHERE tomorrow morning. Props goes to Elbow for winning an award (well deserved) and Girls Aloud who finally won with a public vote. I imagine Coldplay may be pretty miffed right now but after those Grammys who needs the appreciation of your own country?
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