thats a question i hate. its what strangers say to each other in this country when they shake your hand in an environment you already feel uncomfortable in. its so they can put a tag on you, and its aggressive. telling them you’re a singer in a band is a nightmare. i might as well say i burn down hospitals for a living. talking to people when you’re temping in an office can be tough as i have experienced recently. it felt like being at a wedding party back in essex. my skin crawls at the thought.

-o have i heard of your band?
-probably not
-whats it called
-dead kids

o

at this point they screw up their faces.

-thats not very nice
-no i suppose its not…i then proceed to explain to them that the very reason i call my band dead kids is as an attack against hypocrites who like to read about george(5) being eaten by his pet dog or lucy(2) accidentally gorging herself on her mums ecstasy stash for example. it makes them feel better about themselves and they are hooked on it. i tell them that the bombardment of these stories are not news but more a virtual world where we are taken through the eyes of a rapist or a murderer in every graphic and pretty gratuitious detail. lovely.

-when you read it you wish it was you dont you, who done it?

that gets rid of them and then i can go back to filing.

the good thing about being in a band is playing gigs. i like that. i also like travelling. we just got back from berlin recently. it went very smoothly through the airport. the plane was empty too, so it felt like we were in lenny kravitzs band or something, minus the supermodels.

berlin was cold but i found the people quite friendly and reserved at the same time. i dont know what was going on in their heads but i liked it.

you can buy sausages and sex toys anywhere you go too.